Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Not Having Another Baby Just Yet

I ended up going ahead and getting my depo (birth control) shot. My husband said he just isn't ready yet. He thought he was, but he's not and that's all that matters. I'd rather wait longer than necessary rather than not long enough. Thanks, ladies, for all your continued support; we sure need it. <3

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Another baby?

I've been kind of wanting another baby, but my husband's been hesitant on the idea. We visited the in-laws this past weekend and while we were there we FINALLY stopped fighting so much and agreed to be more patient with each other. (YAY!) Cameron's been saying he NEVER wants anymore kids because Harley was PERFECT (and looked like him) and there's no way any kid could EVER come near how perfect she was. Well, when we were visiting the in-laws Cameron meantioned having another baby (FIRST time he's ever mentioned it). He asked what I thought about it because he said that's the only way he sees his life getting better instead of worse, since his family has a history of alcoholism and he's headed down the same path if something doesn't change. We talked about it and our fears and I think we may just be TTC here soon. At 10 weeks gestation we'll be able to do genetic testing to see if the baby has Alpers like Harley and we've agreed that if it does we'll terminate the pregnancy. There is no way we can put another one of our children through the suffering that Harley went through. It hurts me so bad to agree to that, but we ourselves can't handle it, either. I don't want to have the baby and just wait until the day it starts having seizures, knowing it's the end of their short life; it's just not fair to any of us. We still aren't 100% sure (and my mom will NOT like this, but it's not her life) but he threw the idea out there and that's a start! I'll let you all know what happens as it occurs. = )